<![CDATA[Access Your Answers: Intuitive Counseling & Healing

<![CDATA[Access Your Answers: Intuitive Counseling & Healing - BLOG]]>Sat, 19 May 2012 12:41:08 -0800Weebly<![CDATA[What's 4 Times More Addictive Than Cocaine? Sugar.]]>Fri, 16 Mar 2012 09:29:11 -0800http://www.accessyouranswers.com/1/post/2012/03/whats-4-times-more-addictive-than-cocain-sugar.htmlSugar is 4 times more addictive than cocaine. Yes, FOUR TIMES more addictive.

Sugar is 4 times more addictive than cocaine. And even looking at numbers conservatively sugar kills many more people than tobacco on a yearly basis. (See here for more.) Tobacco is regulated. Sugar is not. It expands on this topic and is an interesting read.

"Imagine pouring a 5-pound bag of sugar down your throat … new research shows that this is how much sugar each American man, woman, and child gets each month — and most of it doesn’t come from the sugar bowl.” – Opening chapter from “The Sugar Solution.”
Now, re-read that statement. Here are the key words:
- 5 Pounds of Sugar Consumed
- On Average By Every American Man, Woman & Child
- EACH MONTH!

I have personally changed huge problems with food and most recently sugar addiction (Underneath my sugar addiction was a deep belief of unlovability so the addiction was used as a way to hide and distract that "fact" from myself and especially others.) So far I have lost 70 pounds but more importantly I have lost the WHY I was making myself an extra 70 pounds.
In March I am offering HALF OFF Understanding, Breaking & Replacing Addiction Sessions
Here is another article that's gets into the science of sugar addiction and its impacts on the body.

Should Sugar Be Regulated Like a Drug?
By Bonnie Rochman, Time Magazine

Sugar poses enough health risks that it should be considered a controlled substance just like alcohol and tobacco, contend a team of researchers from the University of California, San Francisco (UCSF).

In an opinion piece called “The Toxic Truth About Sugar” that was published Feb. 1 in the journal Nature, Robert Lustig, Laura Schmidt and Claire Brindis argue that it’s a misnomer to consider sugar just “empty calories.” They write: “There is nothing empty about these calories. A growing body of scientific evidence is showing that fructose can trigger processes that lead to
liver toxicity and a host of other chronic diseases. A little is not a problem, but a lot kills — slowly.”
Almost everyone’s heard of — or personally experienced — the proverbial sugar high, so perhaps the comparison between sugar and alcohol or tobacco shouldn’t come as a surprise. But it’s doubtful that Americans will look favorably upon regulating their favorite vice. We’re a nation that’s sweet on sugar: the average U.S. adult downs 22 teaspoons of sugar a day, according to the
American Heart Association, and surveys have found that teens swallow 34 teaspoons.

To counter our consumption, the authors advocate taxing sugary foods and controlling sales to kids under 17. Already, 17% of U.S. children and teens are obese, and across the world the sugar intake has tripled in the past 50 years.
The increase has helped create a global obesity pandemic that contributes to 35 million annual deaths worldwide from noninfectious diseases including diabetes, heart disease and cancer.

“There are good calories and bad calories, just as there are good fats and bad fats, good amino acids and bad amino acids, good carbohydrates and bad carbohydrates,” Lustig, a professor of pediatrics and director of the Weight Assessment for Teen and Child Health (WATCH) program at UCSF, said in a statement. “But sugar is toxic beyond its calories.”

The food industry tries to imply that “a calorie is a calorie,” says Kelly Brownell, director of the Rudd Center for Food Policy and Obesity at Yale University. “But this and other research suggests there is something different about sugar,” says Brownell.

The UCSF report emphasizes the metabolic effects of sugar. Excess sugar can alter metabolism, raise blood pressure, skew the signaling of hormones and damage the liver — outcomes that sound suspiciously similar to what can happen
after a person drinks too much alcohol. Schmidt, co-chair of UCSF’s Community Engagement and Health Policy program, noted on CNN: “When you think about it, this actually makes a lot of sense. Alcohol, after all, is simply the distillation of sugar. Where does vodka come from? Sugar.”

But there are also other areas of impact that researchers have investigated: the effect of sugar on the brain and how liquid calories are interpreted differently by the body than solids. Research has suggested that sugar activates the same reward pathways in the brain as traditional drugs of abuse like morphine or heroin. No one is claiming the effect of sugar is quite that potent, but, says Brownell, “it helps confirm what people tell you anecdotally, that they crave sugar and have withdrawal symptoms when they stop eating it.”

There’s also something particularly insidious about sugary beverages. “When calories come in liquids, the body doesn’t feel as full,” says Brownell. “People are getting more of their calories than ever before from sugared beverages.”

Other countries, including France, Greece and Denmark, levy soda taxes, and the concept is being considered in at least 20 U.S. cities and states. Last summer, Philadelphia came close to passing a 2-cents-per-ounce soda tax. The Rudd Center has been a vocal proponent of a more modest 1-cent-per-ounce tax. But at least one study, from 2010, has raised doubts that soda taxes would result in significant weight loss: apparently people who are determined to eat — and drink — unhealthily will find ways to do it.

Ultimately, regulating sugar will prove particularly tricky because it transcends health concerns; sugar, for so many people, is love. A plate of cut-up celery just doesn’t pack the same emotional punch as a tin of homemade chocolate chip cookies, which is why I took my daughter for a cake pop and not an apple as an after-school treat today. We don’t do that regularly — it’s the first time this school year, actually — and that’s what made it special. As a society, could we ever reach the point where we’d think apples — not cake on a stick — are something to get excited over? Says Brindis, one of the report’s authors and director of UCSF’s Philip R. Lee Institute for Health Policy Studies: “We recognize that there are cultural and celebratory aspects of sugar. Changing these patterns is very complicated.”

For inroads to be made, say the authors in their statement, people have to be better educated about the hazards of sugar and agree that something’s got to change:

Many of the interventions that have reduced alcohol and tobacco consumption can be models for addressing the sugar problem, such as levying special sales taxes, controlling access, and tightening licensing requirements on vending machines and snack bars that sell high sugar products in schools and workplaces.

“We’re not talking prohibition,” Schmidt said. “We’re not advocating a major imposition of the government into people’s lives. We’re talking about gentle ways to make sugar consumption slightly less convenient, thereby moving people away from the concentrated dose. What we want is to actually increase people’s choices by making foods that aren’t loaded with sugar comparatively easier and cheaper to get.”

Source: Food Matters

]]><![CDATA[Healthy Doubt: How Questioning Your Foundations for Decision-making Can Serve You Better]]>Thu, 19 Jan 2012 11:45:30 -0800http://www.accessyouranswers.com/1/post/2012/01/healthy-doubt-how-questioning-your-foundations-for-decision-making-can-serve-you-better.html

Healthy Doubt: How Questioning Your Foundations for Decision-making
Can Serve You Better

How someone makes decisions is really the key to how impactful and successful they can be with what they want to create in life. Depending on
what part of the globe you are from decision-making can be a very different process. Many Americans pride themselves on and our national mythos is on how much freedom of choice we have and that our individual expression of selves is where ultimately decisions should come from and that in turn “The buck stops here.” to quote President Truman. Basically many American’s only feel comfortable with what they decide for themselves. However that can get pretty overwhelming and ineffective to say the least, so checking out, anti-depressants and procrastination delayed decision-making ensues. It’s almost politically incorrect to say that you want or need to have someone else make a choice for you. But when you do decide for yourself, is it really from and for yourself that you are basing your decision criteria from? And what is happening when you cannot decide for yourself? When is it better to hand over a
decision to someone else?

I think to be really effective in life and in leadership you have to have comfort with different forms of decision-making and occasionally stepping out of the known forms into something entirely unproven.

I have made some pretty interesting decisions in my life; some were great and others terrible. And from this I have to learn what is really driving my decision-makingand what is going on when I can’t make a
decision or choose poorly. I was born in Japan and lived there as an adult and small toddler. I also grew up in Texas. These are probably some of the most polar opposite styles in subconscious underpinnings for decision making: group decision-making with little to no challenging the system vs. boot-strapped super independence glorifying “I did it alone.” Needless to say I have been confused from time to time on which to use. But I think my confusion has been coming from really embracing one way and then being disappointed with one system and then really embracing and disappointed with another. It’s not that one system is wrong, it’s the assumption that one system has got it all right.

I now live in California in the Bay Area. It’s been described in many ways including: this is the best place on the planet for new ideas to meet the least amount of resistance.
I offer this as a way to say that please explore at a deep sub-conscious level where you are making your decisions from and that no one basic foundation is right for everyone or even every situation. I help myself, clients and their organizations understand what their sub-conscious beliefs are so they can then decide if those beliefs support what they want to create. I think freedom of choice is not that only you make all your own choices, but instead that you know when it’s best for you to decide or when it is better to hand off that choice to someone else better suited to help you decide. Its playing with sometimes it is best to be Japanese and consider the group, sometimes best to be Texan and consider the individual and sometimes best to come up with something entirely new … I guess that’s the Californian part of me ;-).
- Rev. Trella Davis, MBA

So get a better place to make decisions from and this month get a Business/Project/Organization Optimization Session for HALF Off!

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]]><![CDATA[Why Wheat Makes You Fat! ]]>Sat, 01 Oct 2011 10:33:11 -0800http://www.accessyouranswers.com/1/post/2011/10/why-wheat-makes-you-fat.html

Why wheat makes you fat

I energetically look at the challenges folks have so they can resolve them. In the course of doing this on all manner of subjects I ususally have to look at food and physical issues as the core or a part of the main issue or as way to help them better embody resolving the situation. Well wheat quite a long time ago really showed itself to be energetically a neuron dampener in the brain (imagine becoming a little like zombie brain) - this is just a taste (ha ha) os some of my energetic-intuitive information on wheat. Here is more information from a conventional and science-based view-point that helps show why wheat can really be hazardous to your weight. - Trella

How is it that a blueberry muffin or onion bagel can trigger weight gain? Why do people who exercise, soccer Moms, and other everyday people who cut their fat and eat more “healthy whole grains” get fatter and fatter? And why weight gain specifically in the abdomen, the deep visceral fat that I call a “wheat belly”?

There are several fairly straightforward ways that wheat in all its varied forms–whole wheat bread, white bread, multigrain bread, sprouted bread, sourdough bread, pasta, noodles, bagels, ciabatta, pizza, etc. etc.–lead to substantial weight gain:

High glucose and high insulin–This effect is not unique to wheat, but shared with other high-glycemic index foods (yes: whole wheat has a very high-glycemic index) like cornstarch and rice starch (yes, the stuff used to make gluten-free foods). The high-glycemic index means high blood glucose
triggers high blood insulin. This occurs in 90- to 120-minute cycles. The high insulin that inevitably accompanies high blood sugar, over time and occurring repeatedly, induces insulin resistance in the tissues of the body. Insulin resistance causes fat accumulation, specifically in abdominal visceral
fat, as well as diabetes and pre-diabetes. The more visceral fat you accumulate, the worse insulin resistance becomes; thus the vicious cycle ensues.

Cycles of satiety and hunger–The 90- to 120-minute glucose/insulin cycle is concluded with a precipitous drop in blood sugar. This is the foggy, irritable, hungry hypoglycemia that occurs 2 hours after your
breakfast cereal or English muffin. The hypoglyemia is remedied with another dose of carbohydrate, starting the cycle over again . . . and again, and again, and again.

Gliadin proteins–The gliadin proteins unique to wheat, now increased in quantity and altered in amino acid structure from their non-genetically-altered predecessors, act as appetite stimulants. This
is because gliadins are degraded to exorphins, morphine-like polypeptides that enter the brain. Exorphins can be blocked by opiate-blocking drugs like naltrexone. A drug company has filed an application with the FDA for a weight loss indication for naltrexone based on their clinical studies demonstrating 22 pounds weight loss after 6 months treatment. Overweight people given an opiate
blocker reduce calorie intake 400 calories per day. But why? There’s only one food that yields substantial quantities of opiate-like compounds in the bloodstream and brain: wheat gliadin.

Leptin resistance–Though the data are preliminary, the lectin in wheat, wheat germ agglutinin, has the potential to block the leptin receptor. Leptin resistance is increasingly looking like a fundamental
reason why people struggle to lose weight. This might explain why eliminating, say, 500 calories of wheat consumption per day yields 3500 calories of weight loss.

And, as in many things wheat, the whole is greater than the sum of the parts. Despite all we know about this re-engineered thing called wheat, eliminating it yields health benefits, including weight loss,
that seem to be larger than what you’d predict with knowledge of all its nasty little individual pieces.

Come find your body's food truth: Complimentary Class: Intuitive Weight Loss & Body Optimization

]]><![CDATA[Go From Knowing Better to Doing Better, No Really.]]>Tue, 27 Sep 2011 05:08:57 -0800http://www.accessyouranswers.com/1/post/2011/09/go-from-knowing-better-to-doing-better-really.html

Go from Knowing Better to Doing Better, No Really.

There are a lot of smart, capable, knowledgeable people out there
including myself who despite the best of intentions, just can’t seem to get out of being “stuck” on some issue.

Now I have both a MBA-business modern masculine perspective as
well as a Reverend-intuitive healer ancient feminine perspective to draw upon to suss out these problems. Neither on their own really seemed to have the answers to solving the core problem: why we get stuck and why we stay stuck.

But in combining them both: old and new, masculine and feminine, temporal and spiritual, analytical and intuitive to name a few key dichotomies, something else emerged that does shed light on the mechanics of engineering change entrapped stuck-muck-ness: spiritual embodied adultness. In a word:
humanity. By not deeming one side of a dichotomy as better and by working to find some balance of integration, this concept just naturally emerged for me.

By embracing my adultness, maturity and power as a human with the insight of energy or spiritual information, all kinds of things are opening up, but most profoundly is the opening of power of ownership.

I define ownership as the ability to 100% accept anything, any situation or anyone for that which it is and is not, and most importantly, neutrally observe your true relationship with it. In other words, true unbiased personal feedback. Gulp. Yes, easier said than done.

So in my quest for creating personal reliable feedback mechanisms, I created and adapted some pretty powerful and simple tools that do just that. I call it: Active Meditation. In a nut shell Active Meditation offers real-time intuitive self feedback of previously non-conscious information and drivers. It’s pleasurable to ride a cruise ship; you get to be lazy, fattened up and directed. Active Meditation is not a cruise ship. If you want to captain your own ship through calm, exotic, known or even stormy waters with greater potency, then this is where you come aboard. If sailing with the captain’s hat on is what you’re interested in, come check out my free class which showcases a few of these tools and processes if you like.

Because I love the scientific: hypothesis, evaluation, results and substantiation and I wanted to validate my work and find complementary tools.

And so I hooked up with a cutting edge brain neuroplasticity research and development group where your brain processing style can be tested.
Your brain’s way of processing non-conscious and conscious information is analyzed. Your brain’s processing style of emotion, analytical thinking, feeling and self-regulation is all measured and results reported with a detailed analysis report to boot. It was phenomenally exciting to have cutting-edge science back up what I was building intuitively. Again, if sailing with the captain’s hat on is what you’re interested in, come take the free brain process analysis test if you like.

But back to being stuck … new research indicates that Negativity Bias (‘Glass Half Empty’ – ‘I respond poorly to threats’) shows it to be the biggest indicator for mental/emotional health issues which of course provide the foundation for poor physical health. Having a natural bias towards negative emotion cues helps keep you out of danger – so there was a damned good reason for the negativity bias. But focusing on positive emotion cues is critical to enhancing your well-being. And either out of balance can cause difficulty.

The ancients used negative bias screening as the first step protocol to healing assessment/treatment:
In ancient Greece at the healing temple of Aesclepion of Pergamum (in Turkey), those wishing to be admitted to the temple for healing were told a joke. It was a test. If they could not laugh or even smile at all, then they were refused admittance for it was known that they would not let themselves heal.

Research also shows that young childhood stress (which these experiences make-up our non-conscious beliefs and patterns) plays a key role in dictating Negativity Bias. So now what can I do?

You can become aware of non-conscious beliefs and patterns and change those that harm and enhance those that help. By owning the process with support from the tools, you can address deep changes in the brain (both the brain's physical structure [anatomy] and functional organization [physiology] from top to bottom) because synapses that consistently fire together, wire together.

This is not for those looking for another thing to try out to “fix it for you” or tell you what your truth is. These are incredibly potent techniques that truly empower your freedom of choice and self-determination. You get to own your worth at new levels, but at the same time own your impacts on yourself and the world around you. I am finding I can be a lot more serious and dedicated about being happy and playfully creating. And isn’t that really what “life, liberty and the pursuit of happiness” actually means.
-Trella Davis

Explore the Intuitive Feedback Ownership Tools - FREE
http://InstantTeleseminar.com/?eventid=22938645

Take the Brain Mental Processing Test with Results Report – FREE

]]><![CDATA[Women as we are, is Enough! Anything Other Is Just a Lie to Control & Limit ]]>Sat, 30 Jul 2011 10:37:59 -0800http://www.accessyouranswers.com/1/post/2011/07/women-as-we-are-is-enough-anything-other-is-just-a-lie-to-control-limit.html

Women as we are, is Enough! Anything Other Is Just a Lie to Control & Limit
It was a nervous experience riding on the train and meditating while the rumbly transport took me closer and closer to my ultimate-vulnerability in full glorious cacophony and exposed display: a full nude group female photo-shoot for the grassroots non-profit www.WomenEnough.net. The group seeks to get real and positive body images of women into mass-media.

I had been looking at the human experience of mass-mythos around Eve. I was seeing how this lie of denigration of our bodies, malice towards women making initiating choices and “deserved punishment of fall from grace” weakens not only women’s natural power of wisdom, inspiration, receptivity and beauty but also weakens and undermines men’s power to partnership in relationships, and receiving the nurturance, advice and companionship from women. An outcome of this mythos is women are kept competing against each other (this is really really really nasty stuff – not remotely anything like male competition) and inferior to men: we are made to be INHERENTLY NOT ENOUGH. This harms us all.

So some men think “women don’t inherently know what’s best for themselves”, so they may think that they are entitled to and should directly control both women and everything else. There is much more I could say about the impacts of this deep mythos that 2/3 of the human population subscribes to at some level (Jew, Christian, Muslim). I, as I am prone, did some healing work on this. I let this belief shift to its evolved next step. It became the Woman (Eve) who with feminine confidence hands the found apple of Wisdom (i.e. Free-will and Adultness which no longer needs Father in the Sky and Mother in the Ground to be Complete) to the Man (Adam). And Adam was welcomingly receiving the Sophia/ Shekhinah/Divine Feminine Wisdom-Presence AND know he is still desired, needed and a powerful provider-protector. In the image I saw all of this and especially Eve’s hand joyfully holding and presenting the apple. This is NO SIN: this is Ownership of our innate forms feminine and masculine of power.

I completely stripped for full hair and make-up (to be honest we did wear shoes from Sponsor UPHeals). I sat chatting with my beautiful makeup artist Tanya Hibbard and noticed the tattoo on her arm and asked about it. She said it was her own original design: it included a nude of herself with many arms one of which holds “The Apple”. There was the same image I saw on the train. I shared this with Tanya and we both had an amazing moment of Perfection. I felt like I could be me and that was enough and that freed me to be enough with everyone else, which made it so easy to revel in the experience of all the other lovely ladies at the shoot. Truth be told: I was the thickest chick there. But I was perfect and felt great. The founder Michelle Fetsch of Women Enough had me go first to “break the ice” and it was a joy to play in front of the camera – and if you are warm, then really clothes are so over-rated. We all got together for various group shots. It was grand. I found out later from several gals my playful, confident and energetic jump into full nudity first had loosened them up (who btw were ALL younger and thinner) to be more confident about themselves and let the last bits of clothing come off.
WOW.

I also got to sit there watching each lady in her individual shots; I was drinking in their bodies and beauty – I was comparing and observing and appreciating and noticing and enjoying like fine art: I was in fact just being. I was not competing, hiding, invalidating/shaming/judging (myself or others) or ANY of the old crap the old mythos would have us do to ourselves. It was supremely sublime.
–Trella

Find Out More About Women Enough:
https://www.facebook.com/event.php?eid=247417458605827#!/WomenEnough
Attend the “BARE”Women Enough Gala In San Francisco Sept 8th:
http://womenenough.eventbrite.com/

]]><![CDATA[FTC & Govt Taking Public Comment - Share your voice on new limits of what advertisers can sell to children to eat]]>Fri, 01 Jul 2011 22:09:20 -0800http://www.accessyouranswers.com/1/post/2011/07/ftc-govt-taking-public-comment-share-your-voice-on-new-limits-of-what-advertisers-can-sell-to-children-to-eat.htmlhttps://ftcpublic.commentworks.com/ftc/foodmarketedtochildreniwg/
Federal Trade Commission
Title: Notice Announcing Interagency Working Group on Food Marketed to Children and Request for Comments
Subject Category: Preliminary Proposed Nutrition Principles to Guide Industry Self-Regulatory Efforts; Project No.
P094513
Published: To Be Added Comments Due: July 14, 2011
Add Yours!
Mine are below:
To the Governing Group/Review Group:

The advertisers/corporations that seek to impose their short-term financial and commercial gains upon the group of our population that has the least power, discernment and self-capability to protect themselves creates the obvious need for the government, FTC and other regulatory organizations to step up an endorse what is morally, ethically and honorably helpful, protective and healthy for the children of this nation.

As someone who has worked professionally in the largest global advertising agencies in the US and abroad, worked at Corp 50 level organizations, as a mother and as having been a child who grew up to the voice/images of the TV being my other parent I dearly urge law-makers to do what is honorable and protect our children by setting clear legal limits on what kinds of products can
be exposed to children.

Children get on avgerage approximately 40 hours of media exposure a week while on average only 40 minutes of quality communication time a day with a parent or gardian. Clearly with American adults working longer/harder to make the US worker the most productive in the world, one of costs is quality time with our children. So the information of advertisers, which comes in powerful as well as subtle forms from a multitude of directions clearly out-weighs whatever the average America parent can compete with.

Advertisers and Corporations have brillant people AND they are very well compensated to use that intellect, education, skill and experience to make their companies viable to the market. By providing clear and firm limits it merely provides another creative challenge for them to solve. This is not the end of any company's business, it is simply the natural process of a company being able
to step up to respond to market conditions and consumer's needs and desires. When government lets the corporation force their products or services in ways that are out of alignment with true supply-demand economics then ultimately it becomes a propping up of companies that are not choosing to operate and change with regard to being healthy, seeking natural growth, flexiblity and responsiveness in their business practices. I speak from years of Corp 50 level experience and an MBA. You ultimately make these companies weaker by forcing the market and consumers to meet thier needs than the other way around.

It will ultimately serve the longer-term financial health of market-place relevance of companies, the physical/mental/emotional health of children and the socio-economic health of the US to take care of and do right by our children in every way possible.

Very sincerely yours,
Rev. Trella Davis, MBA

]]><![CDATA[A Great Lie of Humanity: The Perfect Mother]]>Mon, 13 Jun 2011 23:15:41 -0800http://www.accessyouranswers.com/1/post/2011/06/a-great-lie-of-humanity-the-perfect-mother.htmlA Great Lie of Humanity: The Perfect Mother

A great lie is that all women are natural mothers and that we are all supposed to enjoy pursuing being a perfect mother. A Perfect Mother: is one of the greatest shams that we, as women, are beating ourselves up for not being. Or on the other side the women and men who look down on someone being “just” a mom. It is such a no-win situation. There is no "perfect" mother and just because you're female doesn’t mean you're automatically cut out for mother perfection. So now we have all been set up for the white elephant in the room which no one can state except in therapy: my mother failed me. I have looked a ton of clients and myself on this issue.
Daughters who must choose duty and sons who must prove loyal to the “perfect mother” sham are just trapped in this cycle in a whole other way with its resentments, anger, insecurity and deep questioning of themselves as if they are likable or lovable. And there is so much going on with women’s projected resentment of having to be the perfect mom or expecting our children to validate us as being the perfect mom. Then there is the gnawing of guilt that no matter how well things look on the surface the subconscious underbelly of not having done enough or lying about how great a mom you are wrecks the mind and the body on many levels. Surprisingly even high integrity genuinely loving parents (both loving and caring at the physical and the subconscious/spiritual level) can still have children with some parental issues to work through.

This is the problem not of us as individual mothers or certainly not as children. I think it is a failure of modern isolationism and how we practice “ownership” over our children. Humans evolved as communities where child rearing was a shared large group responsibility - our success on the planet has proved that model works. It has been only the last couple hundred years (and most
particularly the last 50) that raising children is in isolation of other members/caregivers/family. It takes a village to raise a child, and modern life is about isolation at every level. Mothers simultaneously resent all the burden they must shoulder and so are not fully available, present, abandoning and even abusing. But the fear and taint of being called a bad mother, as well as a deep need not to feel alone or wanting to be loved, creates parental behaviors of making children feel insecure, needy and not fully maturing into independence so they can leave the mother. I have seen this across generations and struggled with relationships with my grandmother and other female care takers, my mother, my daughter and women. I have seen those whom self is defined by mother-hood so the control that extends from this onto their children is smothering to invalidating. The mother-child relationship is such a deep bond that it takes incredible sense of self to be really free of it.

I think it is time to give ourselves, our mothers and our children freedom by just admitting the obvious: motherhood is hard, under-valued, taxing and in a constant state of anything but perfect. And we have all been given a raw deal by expecting that one
person can, should and must be capable enough to fill all the 24/7, multitude and complex needs a child rightly has. Who can live up to that? It’s got disappointment written all over it and how does it play out similarly in romantic love (“You are my everything”). Those are some heavy to impossible expectations. It is not fair to anyone of us to keep this lie going. Be happy to share your child to the love, wisdom, caring, play and intelligence of those with good integrity if you have that opportunity (many of us do not). Educate
and enable your child to grow into a person who can meet their own needs and so when grown chooses to have an adult to adult relationship with you because they love and like you, not because they have been turned into Mama’s Boys or Approval Seeking Girls. So don’t demand perfection of yourself or that view from your children, we will all be happier and more content for it.

-Trella Davis, Mother

]]><![CDATA[Limited Abundance? (and other silly things)]]>Wed, 01 Jun 2011 10:10:12 -0800http://www.accessyouranswers.com/1/post/2011/06/limited-abundance-and-other-silly-things.htmlLimited Abundance?
I will share my silliness:
I was looking at this scarcity behavior (hoarding, jealousness, deceptive
kindness, etc.), then looked at my access to channeling Abundance [I channel a
lot of healing energies]... it was lidded up in a jar hoarded away. Argh! Well
the juice is out of the jar folks:
Gratitude-Abundance-Generosity (soft
yellow goldish looking energy). Enjoy! - Trella Davis ]]><![CDATA[A Perfect Mother: The Great Sham & Shame on Women]]>Sun, 08 May 2011 08:10:47 -0800http://www.accessyouranswers.com/1/post/2011/05/a-perfect-mother-the-great-sham-shame-on-women.html

A Perfect Mother:
one of the greatest shams that we are beating
ourselves up for not being. There is no "perfect" mother & just because
you're female doesnt mean you're automatically cut out for mother perfection.

Humans evolved as communities where child rearing was a shared
group responsibility - our success on the planet
has proved that model works.

It takes a village to raise a child
& modern life is about isolation. So dont demand perfection of yourself or
that view from your children, you'll both be happier. -Trella Davis

]]><![CDATA[Healing Japan - Free Music Song Download from Sound Healing Center]]>Tue, 26 Apr 2011 11:31:14 -0800http://www.accessyouranswers.com/1/post/2011/04/healing-japan-free-music-song-download-from-sound-healing-center.html

This is a class project where we focused our intentions consistently on healing
   Japan: The People, The Land and The Water. We held our intentions with
100%   focus while toning. There are also Binaural Beats embedded in the
song that   entrain your brain into Theta (especially effective when
listening on headphones).

This song is in the Key of D as many in esoteric circles believe is the true key of love (same as Pachelbel Canon).
Full Song 10 mins - www.SoundHealingCenter.com/music.html#japan

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